Paddock away - another maximum - 12th July

18 July 2008

Saturday 12th july Paddock 65 vs Slaithwaite 68-0 Paddock? More like Haddock. Another maximum for the grown ups against another side “missing a few”. The tried and tested method of tight bowling and fielding creating pressure on the batting side and forcing them into shots that aren’t there, paid dividends once again. Both Metronomic Mitch and Sir Geoffrey Vaghela bowled superb lines, with only Sri Lankan Perrera looking anything like, top-scoring with 18 while playing correctly with no sign of the sub-continental bottom hand that we’ve seen from most of the other conference teams pro’s. Many of his colleagues, however, have obviously been netting elsewhere as most could have done just as well batting with their top hands in their pockets as the agriculture failed miserably. Haddock have beaten some decent sides already this season, chasing down 289 against Kirkburton and, last week, beating Hall Bower for the first time since god knows when; so we were expecting more of a challenge but 65 all out on a damp but fairly benign deck was about 100 short. As the 2nd half got under way, it soon looked about 300 short. A 9 ball over was followed by an 8 ball over and any deliveries not adding to the extras column were being mugged from the other side of the boundary. Apart from one. An eleven man tantrum was, sadly, the highlight of the day after Dingle biffed a filthy half-tracker over the picket fence and the sensible Slawit search party decided not to venture down a 1 in 2 incline populated by the largest Triiffids this side of science fiction. Clearly oblivious to the fact that the 2nd ball was disappearing considerably slower than the missing new ball, the Haddock captain stopped play for 20 minutes while they looked for it. Why the vampires allowed this profligate use of their precious time is unclear, but there are 2 morals to this story – 1. Don’t bowl there. 2. If you can’t not bowl there, cut the chuffing weeds so you can find it when you do. When the empty-handed expedition returned it was business as usual. Although Geoff and Dingle were careful not to hit the ball too far so as not to further upset our hosts, the total was overhauled in 10.2 overs. Job done. Without a sniff of a clap, a handshake or a pint, the Knights of the Paddock Templar disappeared back into the undergrowth on the quest for their Holy Grail. Must be some cricket ball.